In recent weeks, I have been nostalgic for the attitude and spirit I had when pastoring at Mt. Carmel Church in Monroe from 1990-1999.

It was a small church tucked in an out-of-the-way location. The only way you drove by the church was if you were going to the church. We didn't get many first time guests who simply saw the church while driving by it on their way to work.

So I was a brand new pastor, fresh out of seminary, and this was my first assignment. I knew that if there was to be any kind of momentum, growth, or spirit, it would have to come directly from the hand of God. Because of that, my prayers were focused and urgent and my great desire was for the people of that church & community to have a real hunger for God.

In other words, because I knew I was not in control, I was eager for God to take control.

And to a surprising degree, He did.

Good Shepherd Church is so different. We have one of the best locations in Charlotte. We have state-of-the-art facilities and technology. We get a lot of "drive by business" -- people who come to the church because they pass it every day in their cars. And I'm surrounded by a number of very talented people. We know that a lot of what we do in terms of worship and programming is very good (we also know all the areas that aren't so good, but that's another post).

In other words, we're in control. We're competent. And I've been doing this for enough years that in most areas of ministry, I'm competent.

But I long to be desperate. I long to know again that I'm not in control. I long for prayers that are focused and urgent and for my desire for this church not for it to be cutting edge but for the people in it to have a real hunger for God.

Starting with me.

Because I want to be in the middle of a move of God. A sovereign, decisive, unmistakable yet inexplicable move of God among the people of this church and this community.

That sure is better than being competent.

I continue to be amazed at the level at which people share with me in counseling.

It is a high privilege that people trust me with so much.

It is also a deep responsibility.

What does that responsibility demand of me in pastoral counseling?

• Confidentiality -- if people trust me with the deepest, most painful areas of their lives, they deserve to know that what they share is between me, them, and God.
• A good ear -- it is vitally important that I listen well. Listening involves a lot more than simply being in the same room without earplugs in! It involves eye contact, posture, and the right questions at the right time.
• Truth -- there are times in counseling when people need to hear the truth. Especially if that truth is not what they want to hear! This has been my area of greatest improvement through all the years of doing this. It is so freeing for both counselor and counsel-ee! In the long run, people are grateful for hearing what is right and true even if it challenges what they desire in the moment.
• Prayer -- this is what separates pastoral counseling from every other kind of counseling. It is rare that I don't begin and end these kinds of conversations with prayer.

If these walls could talk . . . but they won't.